Thursday, February 3, 2011

3 days

Threeee days without cable, phones, or internet service--- actually it has been nothing less than nice& enjoyable. Here in TX it's 20 degrees and the roads are covered in a sheet of ice. This weather is foreign to native Texans & can be proven by all the cars along the main streets stuck in ditches from sliding off. All the snow plows& salt trucks have relocated to Dallas for all the travelers in town for the Super Bowl! They have forgotten about us..but that's okay. It's been kind of nice to really have nothing to do but sit and talk with the family, while watching movies & tickling each other's backs. Really it's not much different from my daily lazy life I have been living lately ha. One thing I'm not too found of when not having any distractions is when I get to looking in the mirror. I know what I went through was intense and the surgeries done on my body left more than a couple scratches; it's just hard to look at these huge scars knowing I am stuck with them forever. When I'm swimming in Hawaii.... in a week, let alone every summer, on my wedding day, when I'm having children, and so on...forever. Of course each has a story, I still struggle with having a sense of accomplishment from them as well as a liking for their size, indention, and color. I have forgotten what my body looked like before Skin Cancer until I look at pictures from last summer, now hanging on my walls. Sometimes I am brought to tears at the fear that there still could potentially be Melanoma bouncing around in my cells somewhere in my body , but I know that I have proof(scars) that I have handled it once before and will handle it again, if ever the case. This trial has caused me to realize that sickness, injury, and loss of a loved one are all a part of life. These incidents define us and the way we handle and react to them will shape our future. Who would we all be without a story to tell. Everyone is always dealing with something worse than what we are going through and rather begging for help ourselves we need to be thanking our Heavenly Father for what we HAVE and asking him to help those who NEED it. I love my story and am ecstatic for a 'fairy tale' ending one day(:

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